overcome

Does your home have a stress virus?

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

This old saying really is true…”If mom ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”!!   I found that out several years ago when I was having a super stressful, overwhelmingly busy day.  My husband was away from the house and he called to see if I had time to take care of a low priority task.  I responded by saying “I really don’t have time for that.  I am so busy I can hardly breathe.”   Well, as soon as he heard me say that, and as soon as he grasped my stress level, I could tell his own anxiety and stress level shot through the roof.  He got increasingly agitated on the phone.  It was then that I realized that a wife’s stress is contagious!  I was spreading the stress virus.

Now, I’m not saying that you or I should try to hide our stress from our family members or pretend it doesn’t exist, but I did get to thinking that my husband’s anxiety and stress was directly tied to mine.  As I pondered this with God, I concluded that I needed to re-examine my schedule and my priorities.  Perhaps I needed to cut some things out of my schedule so that my stress level would drop. God wants us to live a peaceful life where we actually have time to spend refreshing moments with him.  This reminds me of the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10.  Jesus comes to the home of these two sisters and Martha is stressed out trying to take care of the hospitality details, while Mary sits quietly at the feet of Jesus.  Martha complains to Jesus about her sister, but Jesus says this in verses 41 and 42:  “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things,but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better…”   

Maybe it’s time for us to re-examine our busy schedules.  Maybe it’s time to cut back on our activities or the kid’s activities.  Maybe we need to spend less time scrolling through social media and checking the latest news, so that we are not so squeezed for time to do the tasks in front of us.  Maybe we need to start each day by meditating on God’s Word and bringing all our concerns to Him in prayer.  For me….it will not only be good for my health, but also for my whole family!  How about you?  Are you stressed out a lot?  Do you need to take a hard look at your schedule? Would your anxiety and stress level drop if you spent more time with the Lord?

How to reduce anxiety in your home

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Who would have thunk it?  (Yes, I know thunk is not a word).  Anyway, I discovered something absolutely fascinating about 10 years ago, and it was confirmed by a young wife at Squadron of Sisters during a subsequent meeting.  Husbands can become very stressed, anxious, and uneasy when their home is a mess!  I had read surveys about this before, but it was really underscored by what a wife shared with our group.

She said her husband started to have pretty severe anxiety problems.  She didn’t understand why. He had a good job. She had a good job.  Their relationship was going well.  So what could be the problem?  Well, she attended an SOS meeting where we shared that men really desire a tidy household.  So, she went home and created a chore chart with stickers (yes, like parents use with their kids!).  She didn’t do all the chores herself.  She simply took charge of creating a plan to make sure the house could become tidy and clean.

The result?  Within a very short time, her husband’s anxiety completely disappeared!  Wow!  I guess that Proverbs 31 wife really has it figured out.  In verse 27, the Bible describes her as a woman who “looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.”  Coming up with a plan to keep your house tidy and clean can really boost your man’s sanity, your children’s sanity and your own sanity! 

How to break free from insecurity

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I’m a fairly confident, secure woman….most of the time.  But there are still moments where that awful insecurity shows up.  How about you?  For me, it often relates to the way I look.  I compare myself to other women and fall way short.  Sometimes, I’m insecure in terms of whether friends or even relatives really like me.  Other times, I get down on myself about whether anything I do really matters.  Ugh.  I hate feeling so insecure!

So, how do we become more secure?  Well, for me, it means turning to God for my “value”.  I need to remember the only audience that really matters is an audience of one.  God is the one with whom I will spend eternity.  He is the one who created me to be in relationship with Him.  He is really the only one I need to please, and what he says about me is really all that matters.

Meditate on these Scriptures and if you’re anything like me, you will feel a warm blanket of security envelop you.

Psalm 139:13-16

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.  I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.  My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

Zephaniah 3:17

The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you; He will quiet you with his love; He will rejoice over you with singing.

Hebrews 13:5

Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you

Battling hopelessness or melancholy

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

When we are going through a difficult season in our marriage, or faced with any challenging situation, we tend to feel so alone in our distress. We tend to feel a sort of melancholy sweep over us, which leads to a feeling of emptiness or hopelessness. It feels like no one really understands. It feels like no one really cares. However, I’ve come to realize that those “feelings” are not correct! It’s also dawned on me that the enemy of our souls is busy whispering lies to us to try to get us to align ourselves with the feeling of despair, hopelessness, and emptiness. He throws fuel on the fire by whispering “you’re all alone” and “no one understands”, and “your situation will never change”, and “no one really cares”.


We must catch ourselves when we sense hopelessness or melancholy starting to invade. At that very moment, we need to refuse to align with the lies of the enemy. Instead, we must begin actively coaching ourselves with truth from God’s Word! Mediate on these 6 powerful bits of Scripture when you’re feeling alone and battling with hopelessness, emptiness or melancholy:


Psalm 73:23-24 Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.
Psalm 40:1-2 I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.
Hebrews 13:5 God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
Romans 8:28 “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
Psalm 34:17-18 The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

** or view this topic as a 3 minute VIDEO BELOW

Are you rejecting your identity?

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I know far too many Christian women who tell me they feel unworthy, unlovable, and too much of a failure for God to really care about them. Such a stinking lie from the enemy! In fact, I would even go so far as to say that if you are one of those women, you are calling God a liar. Yikes!


Despite how your earthly mother and father treated you when you were a child, and despite how people in your recent years have treated you, if you have accepted Jesus as your Savior, then God says, “You are my child, and I love you”!


Is it time for you to come into alignment with the truth of what God says about you and your identity? Is it time for you to stop arguing with God and simply say “Thank you!”? Here is what God says about you if you have indeed declared Jesus as your Savior and you’re serious about trying to honor Him:


Ephesians 1:5 God decided in advance to adopt us into his own family by bringing us to himself through Jesus Christ. This is what he wanted to do, and it gave him great pleasure.
Romans 9:25 “Her who was not beloved I will call ‘beloved.’”
Matthew 7:11 So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him.
Zephaniah 3:17 The Lord your God is with you; He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love; He will rejoice over you with singing.

**or view this topic as a 3 minute VIDEO BELOW

2 ways to combat fear/anxiety

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I don’t know about you, but I can sometimes get consumed with the “what if” questions. What if a loved one passes away? What if I don’t have enough money to be secure in old age? What if my kids make a really bad life-altering decision? When I start thinking this way, my serenity level plunges, and my anxiety level shoots through the roof!


Well, here are two decisions that both you and I can make in order to regain peace of mind:
1) We must decide to follow the instructions given in Philippians 4:6-7, which says, “do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” In other words, we need to tell God all our concerns, ask Him to be in control, and then LEAVE the concerns in His hands!


2) We must remind ourselves every morning that Jesus is FOR us and that we can trust Him to bring something good out of even the most daunting or difficult situation. I mean, seriously, do we believe God loves us and that He is perfect in all His ways? If we REALLY do, then we can relax and realize that, even in difficult circumstances, He has a plan to bring about good things in the lives of those who love Him. This is the essence of Romans 8:28… “and we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who are called according to his purpose.”