overcome

Key to being a strong, confident woman

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Do you wish you could be a more courageous woman, a more secure woman, a more confident woman, and a woman who is able to stand strong under pressure or hardship?  I think I’ve found the answer.  We must go beyond just accepting Christ as our Savior, and truly decide to make Christ our Lord!

When I think about the ladies I know who are strong, confident and unshakeable Christian women, they all have something in common.  They have made the courageous decision to surrender their lives to Jesus and they’ve truly committed to following him as the leader and master of their lives.  This is, in fact, what the Bible calls us to do in Romans 10:9…If you declare with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.  It’s important to note that this Bible verse tells us to declare Jesus as “Lord”, which means “master” in the original Greek.

Have you truly made Jesus your master?  Maybe that’s the missing piece in your life.  I can tell you from personal experience that once you truly make a heart decision to make Jesus your Lord and master, all His promises to love you, comfort you, and counsel you start to come alive in your spirit.  You begin to realize that you can trust his leadership 100%.  Once that happens, you’ll find yourself strong, confident and unshakeable!

Take authority against the devil!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

We have an enemy.  1 Peter 5:8 says “Be alert and sober-minded. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.”  The devil and his demons are looking for ways to destroy your marriage, destroy you, destroy your husband and destroy your children.  However, there is good news if you have asked Jesus to be your Lord and Savior!  In 1 John 4:4, God says “You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.”   We just need to take authority against the enemy.  So often, we forget to do that!  Let’s wake up to what’s going on in the spiritual realm.  Let’s become “woke” in the spiritual sense.

Ladies, we have a critical role to play in spiritual warfare.  One of the first things we need to do is be alert to those moments when the devil is goading us to be critical, rude, grouchy or disrespectful to others.  Don’t take the bait!!  Realize the enemy wants to destroy your relationships!  In those moments, I picture the devil is sitting on my shoulder whispering in my ear all his vile temptations for me to give in to my temper or toxic resentment.  Then I literally take my hand and (pretend) knock him off my shoulder with a loud shout of “BAM”!! 

If you’re married, a second thing you need to do is to pray EVERY DAY for God to protect your husband, to purify your husband’s heart, to give your husband boldness to take a stand for the Lord.   You also need to take a stand against the enemy….every day.  Jesus makes it clear that we do get to take authority in the invisible, spiritual realm.  Jesus tells his followers in Luke 10:19, “I give you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.”   So, in Jesus’ name, command all evil spirits to leave your husband, your children, your home, and yourself.  Then, ask God to fill you and your loved ones each day with His Holy Spirit.  

Let’s all agree to take bold authority against the enemy, and let’s commit to doing this on a daily basis.

How to defeat the demon of insecurity

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Virtually every woman wrestles with the persistent and often debilitating problem called insecurity.  It can start so early in life as a 5 or 6 year old girl hears the neighbor girl described as beautiful, while nothing at all is said about her.  It can develop when other kids easily bring home straight A’s in middle school, but you struggle to maintain a B average.  It can suck the life out of you when no one asks you to the sophomore dance or senior prom, and you start telling yourself that you’re ugly and no one wants you.

What I’ve learned over the years is that the enemy is often the one whispering discouragement and ugly lies into our minds, and we end up quietly repeating those lies over and over again until we sink into a pit of despair!  Enough of that!

We can begin to defeat the demon of insecurity when we start coaching our souls with the truth.  The truth is found in the Bible and what God says about us.  Did you know in Romans 9:25, God says “Her who was not beloved, I will call beloved”?  Wow!  That rocks my boat!  How about you? God says you are his beloved.  That word is a healing balm to my wounded heart.  That word “beloved” means God cherishes me and dearly loves me.  Yes!!  I needed to hear that.

God also tells us in Hebrews 13:5 that “I will never leave you nor forsake you”.  That means that no matter what crazy or oppressive circumstance I’m in, God will never leave my side. He is with me through all struggles and trials.  Yes!  I needed to hear that too!

Don’t listen to the voice of the enemy, and for heaven’s sake, don’t repeat his lies! Start coaching your soul with truth from God’s Word.  That’s when you’ll triumph over the devil’s plans to oppress you and begin to truly flourish as a woman of confidence!

How to resist your “signature” temptation

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

About 25 years ago, I heard a line in a sermon that will always stick with me.  The pastor said we all have a “signature sin”…a sin that has our name written all over it!  Do you have a signature sin or temptation?  Is there one particular thing that trips you up all the time?  Yes, that’s what I thought.  And I’m sure Satan laughs his butt off every time you and I give into that temptation.

Well, we all might have a signature sin or a specific temptation that seems insurmountable, but Satan doesn’t get the last laugh!  Jesus promises to provide a way out of every temptation.  I just need to ask Him to give me eyes to see the avenue of escape and for Him to give me the strength to turn from my old patterns and take that escape exit.  1 Corinthians 10:13 says “…God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.”

I’ve learned that the first step in overcoming that signature sin in my life is this: discovering the lie I’ve believed!  For me, the “way out” of temptation to eat the wrong food is uncovering the ridiculous lie I’ve believed about food.  God is showing me that I have somehow been deluded into thinking that eating a boatload of sugary treats and a ton of french fries would make me feel better!  That’s a lie.  The truth is that eating healthy will make me feel better, so that’s what I’ve been choosing to do for the last 9 years.  And you know what?  I feel great…physically, spiritually and emotionally.

Do you keep repeatedly falling into the same temptation because you’ve believed a lie?  It’s food for thought (pardon the pun!).

Becoming a secure, confident woman

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Most women wrestle with insecurity, and when we live in a place of insecurity, we often make unhealthy choices.  We tend to put up with disrespectful behavior.  We tend to look to other people for our value and become codependent in relationships.  We neurotically try to get our husbands to make us feel secure and happy, but they inevitably fall short, and then we find ourselves back in the pit of insecurity.

Well, I have found that meditating on these 3 Bible verses helps me start to feel more secure and grounded.  I become more confident in both my value and the decisions I need to make in life.  I begin to relax and feel safe.  As a result, I can approach all my relationships in a much healthier way!  Here are the 3 verses:

1) He predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will (Ephesians 1:5) *you are his adopted daughter!  Awesome!!

2)  Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you (Hebrews 13:5) *He will always be by your side! Awesome!!

3) You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. (Psalm 73:24)  *He will guide me in all my decisions and he is preparing a fantastic future for me in eternity! Awesome!!

The remedy for fear-based thoughts

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If you’re like me, you often find your mind drifting toward fear-based thoughts that usually start with these 2 words:  “What if…”  You might dwell on thoughts such as, “What if my husband loses his job?”, or “What if my child starts doing drugs?”, or “What if my husband cheats on me?”, or “What if I get breast cancer?” 

Here’s the truth.  If you and I allow ourselves to dwell on the many what-if scenarios, we will sink into a state of debilitating fear and chronic anxiety.  God does not intend that for us!  In fact, God tells us in 2 Timothy 1:7 “for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

Here’s the simple but powerful remedy for fear-based thoughts.  I’ve learned to catch those “what-if” thoughts and replace them with a much healthier 2-word truth:  “Even if….”.  In other words, even if my husband loses his job or I get cancer, God will still be with me.  He will be with me, always.  This “even if” statement is true!  Psalm 23:6 “Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me”.   Praise God!  I don’t need to fear, in any situation that could develop, because my almighty and loving God will be right by my side!

Bottom line:  Coach your soul when your mind starts dwelling on “what if” fear-based thoughts.  Immediately replace those thoughts with this truth, “Even if that happens, God will be with me, always.”  “Even-if” thoughts push away fear and darkness.  Try it!

** or view this topic as a 2 minute VIDEO BELOW

3 Bible verses to overcome insecurity

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Most women are plagued by insecurity.  As a result of our insecurity, we end up putting up with rude or abusive behavior from others.  Our insecurity leads up to covet what other women have.  Our insecurity prompts us to put other people down so we look better in comparison.   When we are drowning in insecurity, we tend to expect a man to be the “answer”.  We seek and catch a husband and then expect him to make us feel better about ourselves by constantly telling us that we’re beautiful, desirable, smart, funny, intelligent, etc.   However, husbands are imperfect themselves, and something could happen to take them away from you!  Therefore, a husband can’t be a reliable source of security for you.

I believe we would benefit by frequently meditating on 3 particular Bible verses.  They are great reminders of how God sees us and who He is to us.  The first one is a reminder that He loves us and even delights in us!  This verse portrays the picture of a loving father tenderly cradling his daughter in his arms.  Here is the verse.  Zephaniah 3:17  “The Lord your God is with you.  He is mighty to save.  He will take great delight in you.  He will quiet you with His love.  He will rejoice over you with singing.”   Close your eyes and picture God smiling at you as he holds you.  Hear him whispering those words to you.  Ah. So good. 

The second verse reveals that God is our loving father, so even if your own parents have let you down, God will remain faithful!  Psalm 27:10  Even if my father and mother abandon me, the Lord will hold me close.   God will never leave you!  This makes me feel so much more secure.  And the third verse reveals God as our husband and protector.  Isaiah 54:5 For your Maker is your husband— the Lord Almighty is his name.  Wow! The maker of heaven and earth, the commander of heaven’s army of angels is your husband.  Relax.  He will take care of you.  Yes!

Stand strong in spiritual warfare!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

In my current Bible reading, I’ve been struck with how many times God used women to take a bold, courageous, and wise stand against the enemy.  There are so many occasions where a woman steps out to lead or help God’s people when the enemy is attacking.  Here are some of the examples:  Abigail (in 1 Samuel 25) acts wisely when her husband did not.  Rahab (Joshua 2) hides God’s people from the enemy.  Deborah (Judges 4) courageously leads the people of God into war against the enemy.  Esther (Esther 4 & 5) boldly intercedes for God’s people even though it was dangerous for her to do so.  The wise woman (2 Samuel 20) reasoned with an enemy who was about to destroy her city and her wisdom saved the city.

What can we learn from these women?  They were all very alert to the enemy’s schemes and they all boldly chose to take action against the enemy, trusting in God for the outcome.  So here is the question for you:  Do you see the enemy attacking your husband, your marriage, your family, or individual children?  If you do, are you going to just wring your hands in despair, or are you going to take action?  Hopefully, you will become a courageous woman of action!  What does God want you to do?  Do you need to relentlessly pray for God to intervene?  Do you need to boldly confront an issue?  Do you need to get wise counsel from a godly woman? Do you need to establish firm boundaries in a relationship? Do you need to ask others to pray with you?

The antidote for fear or anxiety

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Many of us wrestle with anxiety.  Our thoughts start drifting toward the “what-if” possibilities.  What if my headache is really a brain tumor?  What if my husband has an affair with his co-worker? What if my child flunks their grade and is held back?  What if my husband loses his job?  What if, what if, what if?  Ugh!

Here’s the truth.  God does not intend for you to be paralyzed with anxiety and fear!  And here’s the antidote.  Instead of living in fear about the negative possibilities in life, what if you were to remind yourself that God is sovereign?  In other words, frustrating or even heart-breaking things could indeed happen, but if we trust that God is in control, we need not fear. He has plans to do bring about good things even in difficult or painful situations! 

Here are some specific Bible verses on which to meditate.  These verses remind us that God is in control of ALL things, and we can trust him, regardless of what happens in the future.  When you spend time meditating on these verses, you will discover the antidote for anxiety and fear!

Proverbs 19:21 Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand

Romans 8:28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Ephesians 1:11  Furthermore, because we are united with Christ, we have received an inheritance from God,[c] for he chose us in advance, and he makes everything work out according to his plan.

Joshua 1:9  “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

If husband is struggling with porn

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I was asked recently how a woman can help her husband (or boyfriend) if he’s struggling with the temptation to view pornography.  This is such a difficult question because, ultimately, he has to be the one who does what is necessary to overcome this temptation.

However, there are 3 things that you can do:

1) Sit down with him and let him know that you want to support him and help him in any way as he wrestles against this temptation.  Then gently and lovingly ask him to share with you the things that seem to trigger the desire to view porn.  As you show compassion and understanding, he will be more likely to feel safe sharing the things that trigger him.  Then once he shares those “triggers”, you can ask what you can do to help him deal with the reasons he’s turning to porn.  You may be able to come up with ideas on how he can avoid situations that trigger him.

2) Insist that he actively pursues assistance from a 12-step group, sexual addiction treatment program, or a godly mentor with experience in this area.  He needs other people to help hold him accountable and to pray for him.  He NEEDS to have other men speak into his life and help him deal with the common temptation to lust and view pornography.  Accountability is Biblical.  James 5:16 instructs, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

3) Pray for God to break the stronghold of pornography and lust in his life!  You don’t have the power to do that, but God does!  So, lift your husband to God in prayer daily. Ask God to sever the addiction to porn. Ask God to place a desire in your husband’s heart to seek the Lord over everything else.  Ask God to show your husband the way out of temptation to view porn.  God can do these things.  Our role is to pray!