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Don’t look at the squirrel!!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I sensed God reminding me of something this week, and I have a feeling He might want to remind you too.  Let me start out by saying, as followers of Jesus, we have great purpose in life.  Our purpose is to bring Him glory.  We do that by loving the Lord, serving the Lord, obeying the Lord, telling others about Jesus, and loving the people He has placed in our life.  Here’s the problem.  I often start out my day with a desire and passion to bring God glory, but then….squirrel!  My attention gets drawn away to something else!  How about you? 

It’s so easy to get distracted by the “shiny objects”, the newest gadgets, the luxury items we think we need to have, etc.  And if we allow our attention to be diverted long enough, we start focusing on making more money to buy more things instead of focusing on loving God.  For you, the “squirrel” might be getting distracted by our culture’s relentless message that we need to create the perfect home interior or alter our face or body so that it resembles the women on the cover of magazines.

Ladies, we need to continually check in with the Holy Spirit throughout the day and ask Him, “Am I getting distracted away from you?”  We need to take our thoughts captive!  2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Let me add that this same problem of the “squirrel” or distraction can also impact our marriages.  The devil loves to get us to focus our attention on the neighbor man who seems so nice, or that male co-worker who seems so compassionate and empathetic.  Don’t look at the squirrel!  Stay focused on the good qualities of your husband and refuse to look at or fantasize about another man.  Take captive every thought instead of letting your thoughts run wild, destroying your good intentions in the process.

A top need of your children

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

If you love your children, one of the MOST important things you can do for them is to keep your marriage healthy and intact!  Not to scare you, but the research regarding children from divorced families is alarming.  Perhaps this is one reason the Bible says in Malachi 2:16, “For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce“.  God knows the devastating impact of divorce on children’s lives.

Research by Focus on the Family has found that teens from divorced homes are much more likely to engage in drug and alcohol use, as well as sexual intercourse than are those from intact families.  Also, kids whose parents divorce are substantially more likely to be incarcerated for committing a crime as a juvenile.  Plus, research from the Heritage Foundation found that children of divorced parents perform more poorly at school and have higher drop-out rates.

Yes, God can heal a child’s heart following a divorce, but the scars will remain.  So, work hard to keep your marriage healthy and strong.  Pray every day for your husband and pray daily for marriage guidance from the Lord.  See a counselor if you guys are fighting a lot or if you are growing increasingly resentful.  Don’t let your heart grow hard.  Fight for your marriage.  Your kids will thank you!

Easy way to keep hubby attracted

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Won’t your husband be surprised when you….flirt with him?! It will be a pleasant surprise, I’m sure! C’mon ladies. Why do we greet our children, our dog, our cat, or our gerbil with more excitement than we greet our husband? Why are we more concerned with getting our girlfriends to really like us than our own husbands? Did we even notice the slow and subtle decline of affection and flirtation in our marriage?

Let’s start revving up the romance and excitement of our marriages once again. Maybe we should take a clue from the bride in the Bible’s Song of Songs. For instance, in chapter 7, she flirts with her man and tells him what she has planned for him sexually! “Come, my lover, let us go to the countryside, let us spend the night in the villages. Let us go early to the vineyards to see if the vines have budded….there will I give you my love.”

Start flirting with your husband, and do it at least once every day. It could be a pinch on his tush, or a playful lifting of your shoulder, or a sassy smile that says I’m looking forward to being intimate with you later, or even a wink at him across the lobby at church. The simple act of flirting with your husband on a regular basis will help to rekindle romance, excitement, and his interest in you! What do you have to lose?

Remaining beautiful to your husband

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Here are three things I learned over my many years of marriage to my late husband Raul (any my new marriage to Mark) about becoming a beautiful wife in the eyes of my husband, regardless of the aging process. **For those of you who are new to this devotional, both Mark and I lost our spouses to illness, and as a widower and widow, God brought us together in marriage in 2023!

1) Put effort into looking your best for your husband, just like you did when you were dating him! There are many healthy decisions you must choose to make on a daily basis so that you can look your best. For instance, build into your schedule a 30 minute walking or bike-riding time perhaps 4 days a week. Even if you have young children, there is a way to make this work. Put the kids in a stroller or have them ride their bike with you.

2) Shed insecurity and choose to have a confident attitude about your appearance and value. My late husband told me several times that a woman’s confidence is VERY attractive to men. Flirt with your husband. Give him some playful, sexy, sass! He will find that quite attractive, whether or not you have a poofy abdomen following childbirth or wrinkles on your face! I’m over 60 years old, and I’m still doing this in my new marriage to Mark. Guess what? It works!! 😊

3) Embrace 1 Peter 3:4 which tells wives their beauty comes from a “gentle and quiet spirit”. When I asked Raul what this verse means, he said it means that a wife is FOR her husband and not fighting him every step of the way. It means she interacts with her husband in a peaceful way and treats her husband with respect, even if she needs to confront him about a problem behavior.

Every wife wants to remain beautiful to her husband. So, ask God to grow you in self-control, confidence, peacefulness, and respect for your man.

Beauty tip for non-super models!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Most women are totally insecure about their bodies. Our thighs are too big. Our breasts are too small. The list of insecurities goes on and on. The problem only gets worse after we’ve had children! Stretch marks. The extra poof of your abdomen that never seems to go away. Sagging boobs after you’ve stopped breast feeding. You know what I’m talking about! It’s kind of difficult to feel sexy around your husband.

But I’m going to challenge you to change your outlook. Yes, we do need to do what we can to be attractive. If we need to drop 50 lbs, we need to work on that. If we need to exercise to tone up the flab, we need to work on that. However, once we make a reasonable effort to look our best, our attitude changes the rest! You’ve got to rock what you’ve got! Think sexy! View yourself as sexy when you’re with your husband. Be spunky and playful and maybe even a little bit sassy with him. Don’t be ashamed of your body. Your confidence in who you are will be very sexy to him! In Proverbs 23:7, the Bible says “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” In other words, when you start viewing yourself as sexy and attractive to your husband, you will become sexy and attractive to him!

Are you familiar with the actress Queen Latifah? She’s not thin at all. In fact, she’s probably carrying an extra 30 or 40 lbs. But she’s viewed as sexy because she has that feisty, confident attitude that basically says “I know I’m sexy”. You can do it too. Rock what you’ve got!

3 things keep husband attracted

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I have 3 simple but powerful tips that, if applied, are almost guaranteed to keep your husband attracted to you!

  1. Flirt with your husband on a regular basis, like you used to when you were dating!  Sometimes we get so busy with life and kids and jobs, that we forget to continue stoking the fire with our husbands.  Don’t let that happen to your marriage.  Decide to be playful and flirty with your husband several times a week.  Better yet, do this daily.  Wink at him across the room, pinch his tush as he passes by you in the kitchen, be playful and charmingly sassy as you talk with him.  He will almost certainly be drawn to you!
  2. Carry yourself with humble confidence. Did you know most men are attracted to confident women?  They are, as long as the woman doesn’t have a self-righteous, better-than-you attitude.  So how do you overcome insecurity and develop confidence?  For me, it means spending time in God’s Word reading how much He loves me and cares for me.  How do you develop humility?  For me, it means intentionally reminding myself every day that I am also an imperfect person, just like every other human being, including my husband.
  3. Choose to encourage your husband every single day.  I know this might seem ridiculous to some of you who are struggling with major issues in your marriage, but your husband needs to feel you are actually FOR him.  This doesn’t mean you should overlook any habitual sin of your husband, but it does mean that you at least balance serious discussions about his need to change with compliments on the things he is doing right…or the good qualities you see in him.  He needs you to be his chief encourager.  That will keep his heart drawn to you.

** or view this topic as a 3 minute VIDEO BELOW

Use this superpower in marriage

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I was reflecting recently about how many affairs happen between people who work closely together.  The boss has an affair with his long-time female assistant.  The female newscaster has an affair with the male newscaster who works in the same studio every day.  The pastor has an affair with his long-time secretary.  I realized something profound.  These people ended up having an affair because a super strong emotional bond was created as they worked together as a team over many years.

There is great bonding power when a man and woman work side by side as a team toward a common goal.  As they fight together through challenges and adversity, they bond.  As they work side-by-side over many years, they develop a history of shared experiences and memories that only they know about…and that creates a special bond.  The power of team is highlighted in the well-known verse in Ecclesiastes Chapter 4:  “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Thought for you:  How can you take this knowledge of the “power of team” and use it to foster an even deeper bond between you and your husband?  Can you intentionally begin working together on some common projects or goals?  Think about it…because the “power of team” can create a super strong glue for your marriage.

One reason to persevere in marriage

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Are you in a season within your marriage where you’re feeling battle-weary?  Do you feel like you’ve done everything you can, you’ve prayed with everything you’ve got…and still, your husband is making choices that are extremely disappointing?  First, I want to say my heart goes out to you.  You are definitely in a desert place.  But I want to encourage you to take a different perspective.

You see, awhile back, my husband and I were talking about the ripple effect of our lives.  We may work and work to make a difference with a specific person (such as your husband), and feel greatly discouraged if we see no change.  But here’s the thing, OTHER people are watching how you’re handling this challenge in your marriage.  Perhaps you have children, and they are watching.  Maybe your mother-in-law is watching.  It could be that one of your friends is being affected by how you are dealing with this situation.  As you strive to reflect Jesus in your marriage, others are drawn to Christ.  This is the essence of Matthew 5:16 which says “Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”

I know it’s tempting to feel defeated, but please realize that you ARE making a difference in the lives around you.  If you are respectfully, but firmly, drawing a line on immoral behavior in your marriage, you are blessing your children by providing a great role model for how a wife should act.  If your mother-in-law is an unbeliever, she may be attracted to the “Jesus” she sees in you.  Your efforts to be a shining light for Jesus do have a ripple effect….and that’s worth it!

Don’t look at that squirrel!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I sensed God reminding me of something this week, and I have a feeling He might want to remind you too.  Let me start out by saying, as followers of Jesus, we have great purpose in life.  Our purpose is to bring Him glory.  We do that by loving the Lord, serving the Lord, obeying the Lord, telling others about Jesus, and loving the people He has placed in our life.  Here’s the problem.  I often start out my day with a desire and passion to bring God glory, but then….squirrel!  My attention gets drawn away to something else!  How about you? 

It’s so easy to get distracted by the “shiny objects”, the newest gadgets, the luxury items we think we need to have, etc.  And if we allow our attention to be diverted long enough, we start focusing on making more money to buy more things instead of focusing on loving God.  For you, the “squirrel” might be getting distracted by our culture’s relentless message that we need to create the perfect home interior or alter our face or body so that it resembles the women on the cover of magazines.

Ladies, we need to continually check in with the Holy Spirit throughout the day and ask Him, “Am I getting distracted away from you?”  We need to take our thoughts captive!  2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Let me add that this same problem of the “squirrel” or distraction can also impact our marriages.  The devil loves to get us to focus our attention on the neighbor man who seems so nice, or that male co-worker who seems so compassionate and empathetic.  Don’t look at the squirrel!  Stay focused on the good qualities of your husband and refuse to look at or fantasize about another man.  Take captive every thought instead of letting your thoughts run wild, destroying your good intentions in the process.

** or view this topic as a 2 minute VIDEO BELOW