instructions

Marriage lessons from a dog!

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Have you ever noticed how a man loves his dog? Maybe it’s partly because the dog is clearly devoted to his man and shows it by jumping around with giddy delight the moment his man walks in the door. Maybe it’s because the dog is his loyal companion. Maybe it’s because the dog seems to just accept his man, despite his flaws and isn’t bent on criticizing his every move. 

I can’t help but think wives could learn something from a man’s dog. (Yes, I’m saying this a bit tongue in cheek, but maybe a bit seriously too!) What if you, as a wife, rushed to the door and greeted your husband with love and excitement, just as a dog greets its owner when he comes in the door at the end of the work day? What if you, as a wife, were as eager to please as a man’s dog? What if you were as much a faithful companion to your husband as dogs are for their owners? What if you, like a lap dog, made it a practice of snuggling up close, without talking? The Bible actually has something to say about that. In 1 Peter 3:1, God says that “husbands may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives.” Hmmm. That’s something to ponder. Yep, perhaps there are a few lessons to learn from “a man’s best friend”….

This will make him feel respected

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

If you’ve spent plenty of time reading the New Testament (or if you’ve read many of my devotionals), you probably already know that the Bible has a very clear instruction to wives about respect. God’s instruction is very concise and to the point in Ephesians 5:33. God simply says, “the wife must respect her husband”.
However, two concerns often arise when a wife thinks about this instruction. First, many wives shrug off this command because they don’t feel respect for their husband. But the Bible verse says nothing about waiting to “feel” respect. It simply tells wives to carry out the action verb of respect! In other words, a wife can choose to act respectfully toward her husband, and she can do this even if she’s establishing a boundary on sinful behavior.
The second concern that arises from this instruction is how to show respect to your husband. We aren’t men, so we don’t know what comes across as respectful versus disrespectful. I’ve learned that many things communicate respect to a man, but let me share just one easy thing you can do. Ask your husband’s advice on something and then actually follow his advice! It’s so simple, yet so powerful!
I did this the other day. I was trying to craft a text to a relative regarding something rather sensitive and I wanted to be diplomatic. Then I remembered to ask my husband for advice, and he actually provided a good insight! In addition to that, I know he felt respected. When you ask for your husband’s advice, you’re basically communicating that you think he has a brain and has something valuable to offer. That makes him feel esteemed and respected. Try it.

** or view this topic as a 2 minute VIDEO BELOW

God’s strange command to wives

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

The Lord gives wives a very misunderstood instruction in the Bible.  It’s a command that can seem kind of strange, to tell the truth!  The Bible instructs wives in Ephesians 5:33 to respect their husbands.  But what does that really mean?  Well, when I looked up the original Greek word for respect, it means “to be in awe of” or “to revere”.  Oh my!  You may love your husband, but I bet you don’t think of treating him like you “revere” him! This seems rather strange, doesn’t it?

However, God knows best, and I wonder how your marriage would be impacted if you really sought to revere your husband?  Hmmm.  Well, first we need to better understand the word “revere”.  Webster’s dictionary says revere means to treat with deferential honor or to regard as worthy of great honor.  Are you starting to get the picture? 

Here’s my challenge to you this week. 😊  Would you be willing to strive to treat your husband as if everything he says is really worth your complete attention?  Yes, this means actually paying attention when he speaks and treating his thoughts, feelings and ideas as very important.  That’s how a person should respond if they think someone is worthy of great honor.  Are you doing this with your husband?  Treating him with honor might mean asking his opinion on how things should run in your family and then actually incorporating his ideas!  Treating him with “awe” might mean taking a few seconds to actually walk over and greet him with a smile and a kiss when he comes home…as if he’s important!

I wonder how your marriage would be impacted if you started showing respect to your husband (whether you FEEL like it or not)?  I have a sneaking suspicion that your guy would stand a little taller, feel more confident, enjoy emotional intimacy with you much more, and maybe even be more courageous in seeking to honor God!

God’s guidance in relationships

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

I don’t know about you, but I am often reactionary in my relationships.  I get upset or frustrated or worried, and I react emotionally.  Sometimes, this doesn’t cause any damage, but other times, it’s not exactly helpful or beneficial!

I’m trying to operate under a new and improved system, and I’m finding it works far better, probably because it’s God’s plan for his people. Hah!  I’m earnestly seeking to submit myself to God moment by moment and I’m asking his Holy Spirit to nudge me and instruct me during every single interaction with others.  In other words, I’m inclining my heart and spirit to listen intently for the gentle whispers and nudges of the Holy Spirit every time I interact with family members, neighbors, friends, coworkers, church members, and even the grocery store clerk and the UPS delivery guy!

God designed us to operate this way.  Psalm 123:2  Behold, as the eyes of servants look to the hand of their master, as the eyes of a maidservant to the hand of her mistress, so our eyes look to the Lord our God.  This is such an inspiring word picture!  We are designed to be so tuned into the Lord that we notice God’s subtle, quiet instructions to us, and then we immediately obey.

Let’s commit to seeking the Lord’s guidance through his Holy Spirit, moment by moment, especially in marriage and family relationships.  This will likely be life-changing, and in a good way!  God alone knows how to improve every relationship, how to truly help others, and how to advance his kingdom here on earth.  We need his guidance.