disrespectful

Really offensive thing wives often do

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

My late husband and I had some interesting conversations over the years about a man’s need for respect and honor.  One of things he mentioned several times is how devastating it is for a man to hear his wife criticize him or make fun of him in front of other people.  Even if she is trying to be funny, and even if he seems to be laughing along with everyone else, most men are quite offended by this and feel disrespected by the one person who is supposed to be for them…their wife!

So, this is just a brief reminder for all of us to be ever so careful with our men’s fragile hearts.  Even though I thought my husband’s little quirks were funny, it was probably not a brilliant idea for me to share those quirks with other people! Even though I thought one of his blunders was hilarious, I realized he was going to feel disrespected if I shared that funny story with others.  Let’s all be vigilant in protecting our men’s hearts.  They so desire our respect, especially in public.  Maybe we all need to quote Ephesians 5:33 every morning before we start our day.  It very simply says, “The wife must respect her husband.”

A wife’s laughter

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Here’s something I’ve learned along my journey of being a wife.  Husbands desperately crave respect from their wives, ESPECIALLY in front of other people.  I’ve also learned that one of the things that crushes a husband is when his wife disrespects him in front of other people my making fun of his failures or laughing about his blunders.  Granted, some of his mistakes might be kind of funny, but sharing those “funny” mistakes with other people only serves to emasculate your husband.

I feel like a broken record because I’m constantly referring wives to Ephesians 5:33, but hey, we need constant reminders!  We so easily forget a man’s need to be respected by his wife.  Ephesians 5:33 simply says “the wife must respect her husband.”  Period.  No qualifiers.  God doesn’t say “show respect only when you feel respect”.  Nor does God say “show respect, except for when your husband makes a mistake”.  God simply and concisely instructs wives to BE respectful in their interactions with their husbands. This is a decision you get to make.  From personal experience, I can tell you that your decision to treat your husband with honor, respect and esteem (especially in front of other people), will draw his heart to you and encourage him to live up to your expectations of actually BEING an honorable and respectable man.  Try it!

** or view this topic as a 2 minute VIDEO BELOW

Don’t tolerate abuse or disrespect

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

It is not okay for your husband (or anyone) to treat you disrespectfully.  Let me just say that again.  It is not okay.  I know far too many beautiful, kind Christian women who, for some reason, allow themselves to be verbally, emotionally, or physically abused by their husbands or boyfriends.  It’s heartbreaking.  I heard yet another story from a highly-intelligent, gorgeous woman recently.  She came to me in despair, wringing her hands over her abusive situation.  Yet, she didn’t clearly see that she needed to draw a firm boundary and impose consequences on such behavior.  In her case, she needed to leave until he showed serious, sustained repentance.

Ladies, do you think God winks at a man who is abusing his wife or girlfriend?  Absolutely not.  In fact, God tells husbands they are to lay down their lives for their wives.  Ephesians 5:25 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”  If your husband or boyfriend is emotionally, verbally, or physically abusing you, you need to take a stand.  If you don’t take action, you’re basically enabling his destructive behavior to continue.  Read Matthew 18:15-17 and ask God to reveal His plan for you to take a stand when someone is sinning against you.