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Drawing out the best in husband

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

Our words are SO powerful!  If you frequently tell your husband how he’s falling short, he will likely close down emotionally and search for an escape door.  He may turn to alcohol, porn, excessive recreational pursuits, or even other women.

However, if you choose to tell him about the good things you see in him, he will begin to grow in confidence.  I believe this is why God instructs wives in Ephesians 5:33, “the wife must respect her husband“.  Your respect and admiration mean everything to your man.  If you intentionally take note of his talents as well as the effort he puts forth, and then tell him you are proud of him, his feelings of inadequacy will fall away.  He will start believing he can be successful in what he tries.  He will gain courage to try tackling even bigger things.

If you notice his positive character qualities (and every man has at least one!), and tell him how much you respect him for those qualities, he will be built up on the inside.  He will likely begin believing that he can become a man who makes a difference in his family and for God.  A wife’s words of respect and encouragement can propel her husband forward to be an even greater man than he would ever have been without her!

This makes a husband feel respected

Squadron of Sisters (Debbie Chavez) Leave a comment

If you’ve spent plenty of time reading the New Testament (or if you’ve read many of my devotionals), you probably already know that the Bible has a very clear instruction to wives about respect.  God’s instruction is very concise and to the point in Ephesians 5:33. God simply says, “the wife must respect her husband”. 

However, two concerns often arise when a wife thinks about this instruction.  First, many wives shrug off this command because they don’t feel respect for their husband.  But the Bible verse says nothing about waiting to “feel” respect.  It simply tells wives to carry out the action verb of respect!  In other words, a wife can choose to act respectfully toward her husband, and she can do this even if she’s establishing a boundary on sinful behavior.

The second concern that arises from this instruction is how to show respect to your husband.  We aren’t men, so we don’t know what comes across as respectful versus disrespectful.   I’ve learned that many things communicate respect to a man, but let me share just one easy thing you can do.  Ask your husband’s advice on something and then actually follow his advice!  It’s so simple, yet so powerful! 

I did this the other day.  I was trying to craft a text to a relative regarding something rather sensitive and I wanted to be diplomatic.  Then I remembered to ask my husband for advice, and he actually provided a good insight!  In addition to that, I know he felt respected.  When you ask for your husband’s advice, you’re basically communicating that you think he has a brain and has something valuable to offer.  That makes him feel esteemed and respected.  Try it.