When we feel angered, or disappointed, or frustrated with our husband, it’s so natural to immediately give in to our emotions and let our husband know exactly what a failure he is! We feel entitled to unleash our fury and it actually feels kind of cathartic for a moment. It lets the pent-up steam out of our bodies. Whew!
However, the damage we cause to that person in the process of our “venting” can have the opposite effect of what we desired. We were hoping the person would immediately grasp how wrong they’ve been, quickly apologize, cheerfully repair the damage they’ve done and humbly seek to win back our trust and respect. Unfortunately, when we give full vent to our anger and disappointment, without waiting on God’s timing, we can crush that other person with condemning words spoken in the heat of the moment. In response to our anger and harsh words, that other person usually becomes defensive and lashes back at us…or withdraws from us and goes off to self-medicate in an unhealthy way. Neither option is good!
It’s so much better for us to pause before venting our anger! During that pause, you might have to leave the room to spend a moment with God, but it’s so worth it! Ask God to show you when to speak to your husband, what exact words to use, and how to offer encouragement and hope…even if you’re asking for him to change his behavior.
Here are 4 Bible verses that might be worth printing out for yourself. They remind us to be patient, to wait for the Lord’s guidance and to do what HE says you should do instead of reacting impulsively!
Romans 12:12 Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.
Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. 6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.
Psalm 27:14 Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.
Psalm 32:8 The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.”